Whether you’ve come to a mutual agreement or one party has determined they want a divorce, ending a marriage can be complex and emotional. And no matter how the divorce came about, finding the right representation is an important step in protecting your rights and planning for the future.
But how exactly do you find the right divorce attorney?
Divorce consultations are a helpful way for individuals starting the divorce process to explore their options for legal representation. These consultations allow you to determine whether an attorney is a good fit for you. Think of it like a job interview—after all, you’re hiring them to help you navigate a major life transition.
Just like an interview, it’s easier to find the right attorney if you spend some time preparing for your first meeting. Here are some tips for how you can get ready for a productive session.
Make a list of any questions you have
Most people taking the first steps in the divorce process have a long list of questions running through their heads.
Some of these questions are the general getting-to-know-you type about an attorney’s background, experience, and how their law firm operates:
- What is your experience as a divorce attorney?
- Who will I be working with during my divorce?
- How will you communicate with me during my divorce case?
- What is your philosophy for handling divorce cases?
- Do you have experience with issues surrounding spousal support, child support, parenting time arrangements, child custody, etc.?
These questions are important. However, they’re not likely the ones keeping you up at night, such as questions like:
- Who will move out of our family home?
- Will I lose my retirement savings?
- Will I owe child support or will they?
- What will child custody and parenting time look like?
- How long will the divorce take?
- Will I be able to afford things and will I receive or pay support?
It’s normal to have both of these types of questions, and at an initial consultation, an attorney should listen carefully and give you insight into legal processes and things to consider as you start your divorce. They should also answer your questions about who they are, how they practice, and what you can expect from working with their firm.
If an attorney only focuses on just their background or their recommendations and you don’t feel like you have answers to questions in both categories, it may not be the right fit.
Remember that, ultimately, the answers to the vexing questions like those in the “sleepless night” category above (and many more that arise throughout the divorce process) will vary depending on the specifics of your situation.
Start thinking about your goals
As you prepare for a divorce consultation, consider what matters to you most and where you want to be, both now and in the future.
For some people, the priority might be retaining ownership of the marital home. For others, it could be getting primary custody of the children. Older divorcees may want to ensure they have a stable financial situation during their retirement years, and others may just want a complete and total split from their married years.
Knowing what your goals are will help you find the right lawyer—and help your lawyer develop the right strategy for you.
Consider your budget
Divorce can seem expensive in the short term, but not retaining representation can cost you tremendously in the long run. Your divorce settlement can impact your life for many years to come.
Your initial consultation isn’t the place to be shy about money talk. Before you hire anyone, it’s important to have a frank conversation about your lifestyle costs, financial goals, and assets. What are your money concerns, both now and looking ahead?
This conversation can dovetail with how you talk about expenses associated with a divorce, such as legal fees, expert fees, and all of the “hidden costs” you may not have considered yet. When an attorney understands your financial situation, they can provide you with strategic options for how to meet your goals, including how to fund the process.
Bring important documents with you
You won’t get all of your questions about your divorce answered at your first meeting, but you’ll get better information if you bring some important documents along with you.
If you bring a full accounting of your assets and debts to your consultation (loan statements, tax returns, pay stubs, credit card bills, retirement account statements, legal documents such as titles or deeds for marital and personal property, etc.), an attorney will be able to ask informed questions and spot where more information is needed to help build your case.
This principle doesn’t just apply to financial documents. If you have any documentation that supports your argument for custody, bringing them is a good idea. If there is a history of domestic abuse or violence, you should try to collect and bring copies of any related medical records and police reports.
Prepare for your divorce consultation and prepare for your future
Even though you might feel lost or overwhelmed now, taking the time to prepare for your initial divorce consultation will help you and your legal team be ready for the opportunities that come as your case progresses.
